Thursday, December 9, 2010

A Letter to 'Ask Amy'

This appeared in the Herald-Tribune, a fine newspaper:

"Dear Amy: I own a duplex. The other side of my duplex is owned by a single woman. We have lived alongside each other for 10 years with absolutely no problems. We are good neighbors but not intimate friends.

The problem is that recently a man has come into my neighbor's life, and, because our bedrooms share a wall, I can hear them when they make love.
The headboard hits the wall, and so I feel like I am eavesdropping on everything they do!

I go to bed fairly early, and they arrive home at midnight, and then the noise starts. I've had three hours of sleep or so when I am awakened, and then I am up for the rest of the night!

It's strange, but I am the one embarrassed by this!"

This is a fairly common experience for people who live in poorly-insulated apartments or who go to underinsulated hotels: you hear more of the neighbors than you wish.

I was in that situation, and a friend of mine and I decided to mimic a sex session, much like Meg Ryan did in that movie with Billy Crystal.  We made sufficient groans, sighs, oh Gods! and rocking movements to suggest that we were really getting it on.  We weren't sure whether it would urge them further, or cause them to modulate their lovemaking.  We really didn't think it through.

We also did not think through an effect on us: we found mimicing arousal to be arousing.

And we went from friends to friends with benefits.

I don't know in which we were noisier.  I was distracted!

1 comment:

  1. This sort of thing happens often in apartment living. You and your friend found an enjoyable solution to the problem. I hope it also became a regular one.